2020 Hindsight Commentary: 22 Days, 23:59 End of the World, 24 Hour Party People

I’m revisiting Timely Persuasion 12 years after releasing it / 17 years after writing it / 6000+ days since I jokingly told Jon Mack “maybe I’ll write a book…” with a new round of fresh eyed commentary. Today’s look at yesterday’s chapters is brought to you by 22-20s, Carter USM, and Happy Mondays.

22 Days

I alternate between thinking the split “For What It’s Worth” quote is super forced or conversationally clever.

It seems the old man figures out the “rules” of paradox prevention a little too fast, but that might be because he already knew the answer.

The Hate vs Love monologue always reminds me of the song “Love, Hate, Love” by Alice In Chains. But it’s really me conflating that song title over the lyrics to the song “Confusion” from the same album.

I have no idea what “That’s probably how you blinked out of the hospital the first time” means. I think he’s saying he lost the ability to time travel previously but got it back — though that’s unnecessarily convoluted.

Involving the Dad in the final jailbreak is the right move, though the manner of the recruitment feels a little too convenient.

23:59 End of the World

My third favorite chapter title (behind Wounded Kite at :17 and Won One)

“The plan itself was actually quite good” was not my best work for the opening line of a chapter.

“Winging it isn’t really the right word”—because winging it is a phrase…

Trapping Nelson I the past works plot-wise, but the setup and aftermath are pretty lame. I mentioned in the original commentary that I decided to stash Nelson away in case there is ever a sequel. Whether or not that happens is still a big question mark, but if there is a major arc would involve the narrator and Nelson teaming up on a time travel mission.

Can we trust what we learn about the Dad’s mindset when the old man is the go-between messenger?

Though a bit of a sneaky trick, the cliffhanger does pump some much needed intrigue into a sagging narrative.

24 Hour Party People

The explanation of the many little deaths is super confusing, but after a few rereads I think it does work.

“Repeating trips to narrow events down to a single cause and effect pair would ensure that positive changes are allowed to repeat universally rather than risking they’ll come undone accidentally” more or less sums up how time travel works in the 2017 novel The Rise and Fall of D.O.D.O. by Neal Stephenson & Nicole Galland.

“Timely persuasion as a means to infinite perfection.” 🙂

On the other hand, I don’t think “if our timing wasn’t right…one of us would be dead from the other’s point of view” makes any sense at all.

I’ve always been wish washy on if I’d ever do a sequel, including in this series of 2020 hindsight posts. But in the midst of rereading this chapter I got an idea for a short story companion piece type thing and spent an hour loosely outlining it…

Check out the original 2008 commentary for these chapters:

22 Days  |  23:59 End of the World  |  24 Hour Party People

2020 Hindsight Commentary: 19-2000, 20ft Halo, Now We Are Twenty-One

I’m revisiting Timely Persuasion 12 years after releasing it / 17 years after writing it / 6000+ days since I jokingly told Jon Mack “maybe I’ll write a book…” with a new round of fresh eyed commentary. Today’s look at yesterday’s chapters is brought to you by Gorillaz, Supergrass, and The Mr. T Experience.


The phone call would work better with a glimmer of false hope it was the redheaded girl looking to reconcile.

“Writing off” any concern about the tan van wasn’t really a mistake…

Why the heck would he give an LBDG acronym answer to a question about the logo without the LBDG on it? The explanation is pretty weak.

Why are there 2 doctors? And why isn’t one of them the same one from the other hospital blinks?

The AMs should be A.M. like chapter 10. (And like the Wilco album.)

Someone recently asked me how he didn’t notice the phantom card while playing all of those games. My explanation was “it’s on the bottom for a reason.” Rereading I think that logic holds up — though why it took him so long to notice the duplicate is a less explainable problem.

Aside from the very end section, not much happens in this chapter. The three big pieces are right (accepted to the study, they know about LBDG, someone left him a time-displaced playing card), but could’ve been folded into the next chapter more effectively.

20ft Halo

I guess there are at least 3 doctors, since the “first” one is different from the other two?

In hindsight, the scene revealing it to be the same hospital should have come sooner. Get accepted to the study, picked up by the van, drugged, wake up in the same hospital, a few tests, blink, LBDG, more tests, cards, older self finds him.

“Hadn’t yet happened to live that long” is now the frontrunner for most awkwardly forced lyrical reference that nobody will get but me.

The card technically should have gone through the bandage and hit his cheek based on the established time travel rules applied to displaced objects.

I forgot the redheaded girl was his first wife! (Funny how you can surprise yourself with your past self’s writing sometimes…)

Now We Are Twenty-One

And we’ve come to the backstory chapter! Yes, it’s a trope. But man, it’s a fun trope.

“Years from now and years ago…” is a great chapter opener, and would be an even better overall opening line to a story.

If time travel does exist, this “your conscience is your future self” explanation still makes a ton of sense to me.

Title alert: “Not just timely persuasions as they had come to be called…” (I can’t remember if this line begot the title or if I had the title and worked it in.)

Sometimes I think the microscopic injectable self-replicating nano time machines may have been an unnecessary and outlandish detail, but maybe not

All in all, this has been my favorite chapter to reread years later. I got so absorbed I barely stopped to nitpick as I’ve done previously. Yes, it blazes through a series of “tell don’t show” revelations, but the pace is crisp without feeling rushed and the reveals fill in a lot of blanks without feeling like infodumps. Author bias is certainly in play, but I’m sending my younger self a subliminal pat on the back for this one.

Check out the original 2008 commentary for these chapters:

19-2000  |  20ft Halo  |  Now We Are Twenty-One

2020 Hindsight Commentary: Wounded Kite at :17, 18 and Life

I’m revisiting Timely Persuasion 12 years after releasing it / 17 years after writing it / 6000+ days since I jokingly told Jon Mack “maybe I’ll write a book…” with a new round of fresh eyed commentary. Today’s look at yesterday’s chapters is brought to you by Pavement and Skid Row.

Wounded Kite at :17

Still my favorite chapter title!

A few too many “from the pains”

Technically it’s not a frozen thing anymore after it comes out of the microwave.

He jumps into the time travel sex ed theory a little too fast. (Everything in this chapter seems to happen a little too fast.)

The Local Boy version is called “Don’t Know When,” but I suppose the narrator would use the proper song title.

When the dad realizes who he is it should have gone: “Dad sat on the couch. A smile seemed to come to him slowly. It was a sad smile just the same.”

If past me claimed that GnR never released another good original song post Izzy Stradlin, that would arguably still be true today.

Wrong “acknowledgements” again. (And I’m not exactly sure how he was going to “discretely thank the original artists” in said misspelled acknowledgments.)

Doesn’t make sense for the dad to reference the “nagging doubts come to you” Carter lyric unless he learned that song — which he shouldn’t have by the 1 per artist rule. (That said, “The Only Looney Left in Town” would have been a great Local Boy song…)

The ending bit and cliffhanger save the chapter.

Despite the nitpicks of being over-explainy and rushed, story wise this is one of my favorite chapters.

18 And Life

…and then I negate the impact of the cliffhanger immediately after the chapter title. The first three paragraphs of connective tissue don’t really serve a purpose. “Over the next several weeks…” would have we a better starting point.

The Local Boy artifacts in the basement most logically belong to the narrator, but I don’t recall why he tries to pass them off as belonging to the mom. (His subconscious would encourage him to collect them even if he didn’t want to.)

“I’ll do some damage one fine day” is an example of a shoehorned lyrical reference that tries too hard.

Memory gap section would have been a perfect place for “What am I doing in this dive bar?” I’m trying to remember when past me discovered that song.

I wonder if the phone number ending in 5234 (LBDG) made readers think it wasn’t real and couldn’t be dialed. (It’s still live, and directs callers to study.lb-dg.com to download a shorter version of the questionnaire. That was a really fun side project.)

“…in a latent show of our impending separation” isn’t exactly how “show, don’t tell” is supposed to work.

Similar to the last chapter I still like the plot points here, but things seem to move a touch too fast.

Check out the original 2008 commentary for these chapters:

Wounded Kite at :17  |  18 and Life

2020 Hindsight Commentary: Prophet 15, Christine Sixteen

I’m revisiting Timely Persuasion 12 years after releasing it / 17 years after writing it / 6000+ days since I jokingly told Jon Mack “maybe I’ll write a book…” with a new round of fresh eyed commentary. Today’s look at yesterday’s chapters is brought to you by Supergrass and Kiss.

Prophet 15

“Revelations of her revolution” is still a great line…and still a Googlewhack. (Or it used to be before Google stopped crawling the online version because I didn’t have time to make it mobile friendly.)

“Won One” is a real song my friend Chris Evjy wrote in college. I haven’t heard it in over twenty years, but in my memory it’s still one of my favorite songs of all time. (Yes, I know that’s a little extreme.) A handful of old mixtapes exist somewhere with a live version recorded on my radio show, but after countless hours trying to track one down in the attic of my childhood home I gave up. Mainly at this point I want to hear it again to see if it’s really as great as I remember.

Why is the Local Boy open mike debut on Halloween? My past self could have at least had a throwaway joke about a costume.

The list of Local Boy songs contain an easter egg very few people have discovered. The first letter of each song points you to a website. (In hindsight, putting Dash 7 by Wilco in the middle of the list might have helped.)

I wish there was a little more agonizing over the song stealing implications between the 2 set lists. I mean, 1 paragraph? Really?

“Debonair” & “Start Choppin'” are awesome, but not exactly “a barrage of hits…”

“One more chord to play” is a reference to a different Chris Evjy song.

“Use the gifts you gave yourself” is my favorite nugget of writing advice. Re-reading the original commentary for this chapter reminded me the whole Local Boy subplot is a classic example of that.

Christine Sixteen

The narrator could have shown more concern around the fact that his grandparents house that he knew in the future was gone before its time. (And by “more concern” I mean “any concern at all.”)

Another batch of still, still, still.

I wish the Local Boy name was foreshadowed at the coffee house open mike show or elsewhere before popping up out of nowhere here.

“Author of the hit singles” makes no sense. “See Local Boy perform his hit singles…” 

On the other hand, a musician performing “in his own backyard!” might have been my current COVID-era self sending a message to my past self.

Quite a lot of smoke in the trailer after being inside for “less than a minute.”

The “Let me clear my throat” reference is pretty bad.

I had to double check the popularity of double albums in 1970 when writing this commentary, which means I probably should have done so directly in the text too.

The last paragraph of this chapter reminds me of the song Bill & Annie by Chuck Brodsky, but I didn’t discover that song until several years later. (It would even tie back to the tomato on the plane!)

Check out the original 2008 commentary for these chapters:

Prophet 15  |  Christine Sixteen

2020 Hindsight Commentary: No, For The 13th Time & Fourteen Rivers Fourteen Floods

I’m revisiting Timely Persuasion 12 years after releasing it / 17 years after writing it / 6000+ days since I jokingly told Jon Mack “maybe I’ll write a book…” with a new round of fresh eyed commentary. Today’s look at yesterday’s chapters is brought to you by The Wonder Stuff and Beck.

No, For The 13th Time

My (completely unrelated) work in progress novel starts a chapter with the same exact “Seeing the maid of honor reminded me of the Hearts tournament” sentence as this one. Originally it was an early draft lark for a laugh, but my unreasonable side wants to keep it.

By the established rules, he should have accidentally blinked to the hearts tournament upon seeing the maid of honor.

The change of pace to have only his head above the floor is a more clever scenario than I remembered, though I wish it went further than a one-off inappropriate upskirt crack. (At least my past self had the decency to dress the players so it was only a passing thought.)

I vaguely recall doing this to avoid/discourage another “tell yourself you’re from the future” redux. It’s effective in that regard. And I still buy the floor of a busy party is a great place to hide in plain sight. People rarely look down! (I’ve worn mismatched socks for nearly 30 years and very few people notice until someone in the know points it out.)

Changing the Violent Femmes line for grammar misses the point of musical Tourette’s.

Today I could pretty much rewrite the party arrival paragraph by fully quoting “Why Do These Parties Always End the Same Way?” by Benji Hughes.

You aren’t going to sneak hiding or re-playing the queen of spades past anyone while during a game of Hearts, but somehow Nelson didn’t get busted.

It’s a little too subtle here (which might mean I did it right), but the version of the narrator scribbling on the chalkboard is another instance of his older self head hopping in to take control.

Fourteen Rivers Fourteen Floods

Having a line like ”My father and myself were closest to me…” make logical sense still makes me proud.

Though not incorrect to refer to the multiverse here (the narrator is writing this down after the fact), it’s not the best place for the first reference to it.

I wish I flashed back to the comment about the in-laws vs the way younger author me handled it here.

That “stain on my shirt” bit is one of the more subtle lyrical allusions. I love it, but understand not everyone will connect the dots even if they know the song it comes from.

The section breaks come at odd places here. Younger me must’ve thought it was too short as 3 separate chapters.

Convincing the father to take the bet is too conveniently easy, and weaponizing the younger dad’s womanizing hasn’t really aged well. (The intent was to trigger the time travel reproduction dominoes while also juxtaposing the two versions of the father in a nod to BTTF. It’s innocent enough and in line with the period, but still interesting to think about how I’d handle it today.)

There should have been more to the dad being unemployed vs criticizing his son for wanting the same.

The part where the narrator justifies his crazy, potentially paradox inducing plan is a solid section. (At least until that AWAB part. Ugh…)

Check out the original 2008 commentary for these chapters:

No, For the 13th Time  |  Fourteen Rivers Fourteen Floods


2020 Hindsight Commentary: Won One, Rainy Day Women #12 & 35

I’m revisiting Timely Persuasion 12 years after releasing it / 17 years after writing it / 6000+ days since I jokingly told Jon Mack “maybe I’ll write a book…” with a new round of fresh eyed commentary. Today’s look at yesterday’s chapters is brought to you by Local Boy & Bob Dylan.

Won One

This chapter should have started at the bar. My younger self had a habit of writing mostly continuously, prompting these bridge scenes.

Was there really such thing as “an ample selection of microbrews” in the year 2000?

Way too many “With that I…’s” throughout. (5 to start sentences, which doesn’t seem bad but is.)

Drifting between past and present tense was an intentional choice to illustrate the way brain waves interact between two time traveling selves. It was a great idea at the time, but looks like mismatched tenses to me now.

Following the redheaded girl home could have lasted more than a sentence, giving him time to reminisce, ponder, flashback, etc.

“Thunk rhymes with drunk” as the segue out of his thoughts and into the bar still amuses me.

The BTTF quote is super forced, but I do still dig the bit at the end of this chapter when his older self takes control.

Time travel rules wise, a blackout is the perfect time for the consciousness of another self to take over (and this was written before The Butterfly Effect came out). It is a little unintuitive since you typically pick a memory to travel back to, and a blackout is the absence of one. The idea here is that you’re more susceptible to timely persuasion while in an inebriated state.

“I refuse to undo what I’ve already done!” refers to setting the sister up with Nelson — something we already know the old man will later change his mind about…or does he?

When he passes out, his other self relinquishes control and the blacked out body collapses. That’s why he doesn’t remember any of it in the next chapter.

Rainy Day Women #12 & 35

Fun fact: If there’s ever a sequel, I’ve always planned to resume chapter numbering at 27 and re-use this song for chapter 35 — revisiting the wedding from another point of view.

How could I not find a way to fit in a “No Scrubs” reference here?

This chapter may be the only time “incesticide” has ever been properly used in a sentence.

The suspense around his younger self potentially not showing up should have lasted more than a couple of sentences.

I forgot that I did use the “Is she really going out with him?” line here, which makes me annoyed my younger self didn’t think to open with it. (I also cringe at my younger self’s “b***h has him whipped” line…)

(Note: I reread my original commentary post where my younger self said he considered that opening but decided the line worked better here. He was wrong…)

The big font thing is a little obnoxious, but I love it. (Sorry, BD!)

2 “circumstances” in the same sentence of the objection. Ouch…

With that…

Also 2 dumbfoundeds in this chapter. I need to go back and gift my younger self a better thesaurus.

Lots of blows are landing square.

Dad should have threatened to kill his invisible son, mirroring the chase scene from earlier.

Yes, I am laughing that the last line of the wedding chapter is “piece of cake.”

Check out the original 2008 commentary for these chapters:

Won One  |  Rainy Day Women #12 & 35

2020 Hindsight Commentary: Eight Days a Week, Drivin’ on 9, 10 A.M. Automatic

I’m revisiting Timely Persuasion 12 years after releasing it / 17 years after writing it / 6000+ days since I jokingly told Jon Mack “maybe I’ll write a book…” with a new round of fresh eyed commentary. Today’s look at yesterday’s chapters is brought to you by The Beatles, Ed’s Redeeming Qualities, and The Black Keys.

Eight Days A Week

Sorted/sort word choice is a little awkward.

The narrator’s logic of tackling his attempts at saving his sister in reverse chronology still makes sense to me, but his logic of making a completely unrelated and self serving time trip right after explaining this plan is a head scratcher.

His sister “turning fifteen” during the cribbage scene is a neat bit of phrasing that I wish I could say was planned, but I’m pretty sure was a happy accident.

If I could go back, I’d drop the motherf@#$er inside joke and have the Dad yell without the cuss.

Drivin’ On 9

I never noticed the “Drivin’ on 9” vs 9/11 parallel in the chapter title before now.

A barhopping memory is a better anchor point to blink to than a library, but it should have been about a song playing at a bar (if not a bar band…)

“Discarded dumpster discoveries” is a pretty good line, even with author bias in play.

Conversely, “the office I worked in as a bitch” is cringeworthy now.

Nowadays I criticize stories that reference times ending with :00. :15, :30, :45 as being unrealistic, but my past self had no problem with it. (My current self also picked up a habit of setting alarm clocks and oven temperatures to palindromic numbers, which feels like something the narrator might do. Who made who?)

Using italics before he realizes he spoke aloud are not a mistake. Both selves were tuned in to each other (and other others) telepathically, making it feel like he spoke aloud when he didn’t.

The logistics of how he would pin himself down on the couch, have that conversation, and then stand up are a little fuzzy. (Plus the “I’m stoned and half out of it so I won’t question the fact that my future self is here” doesn’t play quite as well as I remembered/intended.)

I still like the bulk of this chapter, but the end falls flat/fizzles fairly fast.

10 A.M. Automatic

Kudos to Bryan Davidson for convincing me to “officially” make AM/PM a different size font like you’re supposed to throughout, which looks especially good in the paperback chapter title.

I’m still torn on whether the lyrical Tourette’s should be obvious or subtle. Which works better?

The odds were in my favor that I’d still be able to at least observe from a few feet above or below. Easy come, easy go, little high, little low.


The odds were in my favor that I’d still be able to at least observe from a little high/little low.

Probably could have handled the elevation foreshadowing better or as a surprise.

That Beach Boys reference is so well placed it makes me lean towards subtle. Same with Pearl Jam a little later. You barely realize it’s a reference.

Reading the transition to the creepy hospital still gives me the same surge of giddy adrenaline it did when my past self went off-outline and that scene wrote itself in the first draft.

There is no way I didn’t check if “straightjacket” was one word or two. Two words seems wrong. I wonder if my younger self misunderstood what a dot in the middle of a dictionary word really meant (it’s syllables, right?)

If he blinked back to the day of the plane ride, he hasn’t told himself what to do yet so his other self shouldn’t be committed. Unless he kept going back and we’re seeing the aftermath of many blinks. But I don’t remember my intent. (Other changes “catch up to you” when you go back to real time, so could be his older self still meddling — or lying.)

I sooo wish it said “she stood me up” instead of “she stood him up”

Check out the original 2008 commentary for these chapters:

Eight Days a Week  |  Drivin’ on 9  |  10 A.M. Automatic

2020 Hindsight Commentary: Five Seconds to Hold You, 6ix, Tram #7 to Heaven

I’m revisiting Timely Persuasion 12 years after releasing it / 17 years after writing it / 6000+ days since I jokingly told Jon Mack “maybe I’ll write a book…” with a new round of fresh eyed commentary. Today’s look at yesterday’s chapters is brought to you by Devics, The Lemonheads & Jens Lekman.

Five Seconds to Hold You

Feels there should have been a little more of a riff on the (unfounded) rumors that Kurt wrote most of the songs on Live Through This.

Covered, cover to cover.

My past self (via the narrator) citing a Reverend Horton Heat / Butthole Surfers bill “inexplicably” selling out is hilarious in hindsight.

The bench went back in time, so it should now be “missing” in the future.

Quibbles on execution aside, I do still enjoy the concept of the O Henry / Twilight Zone style arc of this chapter where he succeeds in controlling his time travel but can’t complete his mission due to a physical technicality.


Has that “drown my sorrow” typo has always been here? (I also can’t decide and/or can’t remember if it was intentional or a typo.)

This dual-leaguer stuff is unnecessarily confusing.

A “recent library memory” is a vaguely lame way to blink and lazy writing.

As the back room is described, the force of the bowling ball probably would have carried it out of that back room completely. Maybe his older self planted the ball for him to find, or stood back there to stop it.

Technically he threw Glitzy through the pins a month earlier, but with this time travel thing being so new to him I let him get that one wrong on purpose. He’s already acknowledged being bad at math outside of bowling.

If he was sitting on a stool when he blinked from the bar, the fall down bit should have happened again upon his return. (A better way to handle would have been to have him stand to specifically avoid that. It doesn’t say he didn’t….)

“Who injected you?” implies someone else was a possible answer.

“Stunned by this turn of events…” is a little over the top coming right after such a big reveal. Definitely a “show, don’t tell” moment.

Tram #7 to Heaven


That airplane blink should have blocked something important vs being a pure setup for the elevation rule. As is it’s mostly unnecessary.

The second half of this chapter (starting in the car with his father) is one of my go-tos for public readings. A nice midpoint section that tees up a lot of the overarching plot pieces without getting too spoilery. (Depending on the audience, I sometimes pivot to the first bowling scene or his first songwriting session with Local Boy since there’s no actual time travel in this section.)

Check out the original 2008 commentary for these chapters:

Five Seconds to Hold You  |  6ix  |  Tram #7 to Heaven

2020 Hindsight Commentary: Gimme Three Steps, Four Hours in Washington

I’m revisiting Timely Persuasion 12 years after releasing it / 17 years after writing it / 6000+ days since I jokingly told Jon Mack “maybe I’ll write a book…” with a new round of fresh eyed commentary. Today’s look at yesterday’s chapters is brought to you by Lynyrd Skynyrd & M. Ward.

Gimme Three Steps

Future me would retcon the opening line here to “I am from the future…I am from the future…I am from the future…” like the Benji Hughes chant throughout LILILIL.

“…any thought sunk before I could get my mind afloat enough to theorize…” would have been a better line.

“Pass right through me” is a little overused. (It’s both an accurate descriptor of what’s happening and a reference to a song by Julie Smiley that nobody knows.)

Leap year day had to be intentional, but I’m pretty sure it was unrelated to the release date. The calendar origin of the word “blink” still makes me smile as much as when I inserted it into a late draft.

The full Tori Amos lyric is a little forced. The original slight misquote flows better.

CDs and mixtapes date things a little.

He falls asleep listening to Won One, teasing that it may all be a dream when he wakes up near the end. (It’s not a dream, but the door was intentionally left open.)

The earthquake bit is a little dumb, though you really do shrug them off like that after you’ve lived in LA for awhile.

The watch probably should have been 97 minutes out of sync, but that’s getting super specific and picky…

“Is this real?” should have been in italics to justify the tense change in the story world since it’s a message from his future self.

Four Hours in Washington

Accidentally perfect numbered title…except that the chapter is mostly set in Oregon.

Printed internet driving directions! (Remember, it is set in 2002.)

Six consecutive paragraphs that start with “I…” Ugh…

Two “set forths” also. Ugh, ugh.

Syndicated college newspaper articles. Did those even exist?

Kinda cool the way the “Th” in “The” overlaps in the font BD chose for the remastered layout.

An early incarnation of my real life college radio show was called “All The Brits and More!” before later settling on “The Lack of Evidence Show”

I’m still the only person to use cacophony of controlled chaos to describe Nirvana according to Google. (If that MetalInsider article it still there, it has the phrase in the text but Nirvana in an unrelated cached sidebar article.)

Chauvinism is probably a better word to describe the father. The plot device of the young father being this way but his older version having grown out of it still works for me, though in today’s era I’m not sure if I would’ve gone there as readily as my past self did.

He can’t get to the future because he has no memory of it, and time travel is powered by the memories of the collective consciousness. What if a time traveler was able to paint a vivid picture of the future into the ears of other time travelers? Would those embedded memories be traversable? Sounds like decent fodder for a sequel…

Turning the throwaway “you need to have balls” line into the scene segue still amuses me to no end even though it shouldn’t.

The ball and newspaper went back in time with him after visualizing the show, but are still there when he returns. This is a mistake. (Technically the carpet and maybe even the bed should have come with him too depending on how far the “electricity” rule of time travel extends.)

Was my future self telling me about the hyperloop when I wrote about a high-speed tunnel from New York to London? Or did Timely Persuasion inspire Elon Musk?

I had an annoying habit of not putting paragraph breaks in obvious places–which is fascinating as I also recall agonizing over where to break up certain longer paragraphs and/or merge short ones during one of the final cleanup drafts. Always trust your first instinct; it’s the one your future self is asking for.

Check out the original commentary for these chapters:

Gimme Three Steps | Four Hours in Washington

Why I still love watching Nirvana Unplugged every April 8th

  • Pat Smear’s striped guitar
  • Baby faced Dave Grohl
  • All the cover songs
  • The secret electric guitar on Man Who Sold the World
  • Pennyroyal Tea (“Am I gonna do this…by myself?” — and the disastrous duet with Pat during rehearsal in the extras that explains the exchange)
  • The guy who looks like a burly Cliff Clavin in the audience
  • Screwing up the setlist to play Dumb / Polly back to back but requesting a sequencing edit for broadcast
  • Playful, sarcastic, super smart Kurt
  • On a Plain!
  • Sweet Home Alabama!!!
  • “What are they tuning, a harp?”
  • Dave Grohl red-handedly caught smoking a joint on camera in close up
  • Kurt in his swivel chair
  • The vocals on Lake of Fire
  • “Fuckin’ Nirvana”
  • “How are we supposed to play In Bloom acoustically?”
  • When Kurt slowly does the opening riff to Negative Creep while deciding if they can do it acoustically
  • Kurt’s eyes / gasp near the very end of Where Did You Sleep Last Night?